Heartbreak...

This little one will not be joining my earthly family...I hope your heavenly siblings are embracing you and holding you the way I will never get a chance to.

My repeat bloodwork showed that despite the progesterone my levels were dropping and at 5 weeks 4 days I lost my precious little one.  I'm heartbroken but trying to hold things together for Juniper's sake.  It's so hard when all day she asks me for a baby and follows anyone she sees that is holding a newborn.  Mamma is trying to give you that baby, Juniper, I promise I'm trying!  For now I will try to heal and keep hope for the future.

5/27/15

I hate the waiting game part!  I went in for bloodwork yesterday and finally heard back around 11:30 this morning that they want me to start taking progesterone and do repeat bloods tomorrow.  I'm having some dark spotting today which has me stressed.  I know dark means old and is not necessarily a bad thing but it definitely doesn't make me feel very safe.  Hoping tomorrow brings better news!

Terrified but hopeful...

Yes it, super faint...but it's there...right?!?!

I'm not disappearing this time.  Good or bad I'm here and talking and terrified and maybe a tiny bit excited.  Internet world be kind to me I need your support!